Dr. Anju Chawla



FHASSD means Don’t Rush

15 Aug 2023, By  Dr. Anju Chawal


And here it was Jai again unable to comprehend what made him over commit the results to his boss for the nth time!!

Jai is a high potential high performer ever since he can recall and his highly decorate Wall of fame is the Cheer leader in support. He is dependable, trustworthy, responsible and yes all the like traits that come to your mind, without ChatGpt (pun intended). He scored 3 promotions in merely 5 years which is from a Programmer in the company to a Project Manager.

Do people look up to him, well yes! And do people envy him, well yes!

A year back ‘Coaching for Star Performers for Succession planning’ was rolled out in his organization and no points for guessing Jai was selected as well. And just like many others if you too are thinking –‘Why Coaching or any other help for such bright talent? Is he losing his sheen?’ , then you need to know what Coaching is :

ICF defines coaching as partnering with clients in a thought-provoking and creative process that inspires them to maximize their personal and professional potential. The process of coaching often unlocks previously untapped sources of imagination, productivity and leadership.

We all have goals we want to reach, challenges we’re striving to overcome and times when we feel stuck. Partnering with a coach can change your life, setting you on a path to greater personal and professional fulfillment.

So Coaching is a gift from organization to the employee to be able to check into his inner untapped potential and become the better version of himself.  And here Jai is set on a 24 weeks coaching journey with me in the capacity of the coach.

Very honestly, I was excited to have such a bright talent as my coachee. Afterall its all about co-creating knowledge and I was looking forward to what emerges in his case as the untapped potential. But this was only until I wore the hat of a coach for him, because then I had to follow ethics of being non judgmental, not attached but connected facilitator. Anyways, enough if distraction for you all. Lets come to business- and that is the coaching journey.

Owing to paucity of time and space I will only share the meat for you all to know why is this piece titled a hear alike to FAST.

And here is Jai-the Star contracting with me to offer his vulnerability, openness and courage and in turn expecting Integrity form me. All is set and he is telling his story of reaching till here as he wanted to come to a goal organically for his revamp to his better version. And I was silently making my notes. His energy was positive, tone so delightful as if he was living every word that he was speaking. It was a coach’s delight  situation, but I believe in Laser sharp coaching so I decided to reiterate a few points for him, the first one being “I hear you saying that you found yourself in a shit for the first time when you couldnot keep your promise with your reporting officer, and though it had nothing to do with your KRA yet that year you had tough time during your appraisal.” And I could see the change in his energy, from a chirpy story teller that day he turned into a cognitive thinker who tried his best to comprehend what I just spoke.

And there was a long Verbal silence though a lot of non-verbal conversation was going on within Jai. And I was respecting this silence.

After the ups and downs in his thoughts, he said- Anju I would like to share a few more incidents where in I was caught in some similar situation, can you help me decode these for me so that I know why at the first place I was even caught in such a situation? And now I knew we were on the verge of partnering for a goal. We did and the conversation, probing of his words and expressions went on.

The surprising revelation was- when Jai was in Happy, Angry, Sad or Fearful state of emotions he will over commit and that will result in a trap for him. He wouldn’t want to go back and neither would have the bandwidth to fulfil. And during all such episodes he will think Why O Why did I even commit.

I helped him decode his actions by raising his self-awareness to understand that when one is in FHASSD emotions, one should not make any CID( Critical, Important or Difficult ) Decisions else chances are you will end up seeing yourself in the trap of your own words which will trouble a start performer like yourself.

And finally it was time for me to ask- Jai whats your key take away from the conversation- and he said “When I will experience Fear, Happiness, Sadness, Surprise or Disgust I will never rush into decision making, will rather take a pause before that so that I don’t end up over committing on mere basis of my emotions.”. And then with his permission we closed the session.

Just as a start performer needed to be tapped into his inner potential or had to be facilitated through conversation to ensure he doesn’t fall into his own build trap, all of us need to be self-aware. If you also are the one who feels you are like Jai or nearly him yet little at surprise with yourself , all you need is visit www.anjuchawla.com and book an appointment to decode your emotions with me.

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